The Phone

While surfing blogclicker today, I came across this entry from Anita at Fighting Inertia. As soon as I posted a comment, I knew I had a lot more to say on this subject. She writes about her most annoying pet peeve, call waiting, calling it "man's worst invention."

In college, I shared a suite with three other roommates. One of my roommates decided that she needed call waiting, so she offered to pay for it. I agreed, with the stipulation that I wasn't going to ever pay for it, and when someone was on the phone with me, there was no guarantee that I would be bothered to answer the call waiting. She said okay, but would I please just take a message if someone did call. Most of the time, I ignored the call waiting. Everyone I called or who called me was calling long distance, so I felt justified in ignoring it. I consider it quite rude to call someone and be left hanging while they go answer someone else, especially on my nickel.

Most people I call do not have call waiting because it is an extra expense on the phone bill, and they think it's rude. My sister has it, but if I call her and she gets another call, she is always quick to get back to me. I have told her I think call waiting is rude, so she knows how I feel about it.

Perhaps I'm a technophobe. I do not like the phone anymore. I used to like it, when I was a teenager and talking to my significant other all the time. Anyone else I wanted to call back then was long-distance, so I rarely just chatted to my friends. In my house growing up, phones were used for a purpose, not for idle chatter.

Now, I do not like to be disturbed. Phone conversations have a way of making time pass too quickly. Once a year, my Aussie pen pal calls me and we talk, way too long. I make an exception for her since she lives out of the country. :) When I talk to my friends or family members, I find that I often have nothing to talk about. My days pass in a similar manner, so there is no news to report.

I have a dial-up internet connection, and the telemarketing calls have gone way down since I used to spend so much time online in the evenings. My family knew that to get ahold of me that they'd have to call before 7pm, the time I used to get online. I would get rid of my phone altogether, but I need it for dial-up internet access.

I have a cellphone, but I keep it turned off and I don't give out the number. I don't even have the number memorized. I keep it for emergencies, using it if I need to call DH for some reason while I'm at work or whatever.

And that brings me to my pet peeve about phones: no one is that damn important. I cannot tell you how many times I've been in a movie theatre and some asshole forgets to turn off their phone. During "Troy," a stupid woman's phone went off and she fumbled for a good five minutes trying to find the phone in her purse and turn it off. I was pissed! I paid $7 to see that movie undisturbed and there are always idiots who spoil my enjoyment. During "Elektra," a stupid man's phone went off, playing Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" as a ringtone. Now that was UTTERLY RIDICULOUS, considering the movie was at a very solemn part. I wanted to bash his skull in.

Repeat after me: YOU ARE NOT THAT DAMN IMPORTANT. In fact, you are an insignificant slug who thinks that having a cellphone turned on all the time makes you cool or powerful. It just makes you look like an idiot--like you are so pathetic that you have to be reachable at all hours for other inane chattering morons.

Once I was in Wal-Mart, and a stupid woman's cellphone went off while she was looking at shampoo. She started conversing at the top of her lungs about where she was at and what she was looking at. I wanted to bash her skull in. Instead, I just laughed at her sheepleness and went about my business.

Idiots talking on cellphones while driving deserve to be removed from the gene pool.

Idiots who give their kids cellphones are just stupid. Make them work for it, and then police what they do with them.

Picture-taking cellphones are stupid.

Text-messaging is a stupid waste of money.

NO ONE IS THAT DAMN IMPORTANT.